Paulina Porizkova takes fans through her deep grief and the moment she realized her husband, Ric Ocasek, had died in a moving new video.
It was almost two years ago that Paulina Porizkova discovered Ric Ocaseklifeless body in their Manhattan home. Now Paulina talks about the “nightmare” moment when she realized her beloved husband was gone, and the grief and anger she experiences to this day. “I saw what happened. I felt his cheek thinking, “Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God, ”says Paulina in her last episode Yahoo! Life video series.
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Her life changed forever on September 15, 2019. Paulina says she went up to their room to bring Ric coffee. “I thought he was sleeping a little late. I walked in and he looked like he was sleeping – until I put down the coffee mug and could tell his face that wasn’t sleeping, even though he looked very peaceful, ”said solemnly the top model in her video. “And there was a certain hunch when I walked into the room; there was some sort of knowledge of what I was going to find.
Ric, prolific record producer and lead singer of the Cars, had died of high blood pressure and heart disease at the age of 75. He was recovering from an undisclosed operation at the time of his death. “I remember thinking, ‘Oh, they never show that part in the movies’ – like one of the crazy thoughts that just floats next to you. I saw what happened. I felt his cheek thinking, “Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.'”
Then she had the impossible task of telling their two sons, Jonathan ocasek, 27 and Oliver ocasek, 22 years old, that their father had died. “ And in my mind I calmly walked out of the room and went down and told the boys what had happened, but instead I started to cry and my legs gave way and I couldn’t walk so I had to crawl downstairs. on all fours, ”recalls Paulina. “And that’s what I found really amazing, and looking back you just really don’t know how you’re going to react.”
Paulina compared the situation to a “nightmare” from which she could not escape. “You are so torn; you bounce back and forth between what you just saw, how your world just came to a complete stop, and how you react to it. It’s all happening in your brain at the same time. It’s just so much information, and then it kind of shuts you down, ”she said.
Paulina Porizkova and Ric Ocasek at the 2013 American Museum of Natural History Gala (Gregory Pace / BEI / Shutterstock)
She has spent this year and eight months crying deeply and has no qualms about continuing to do so publicly. But she also shows her fans who she is without Ric. “I feel like I’m in a much stronger position than I’ve been in a long time,” Paulina explained. “I feel like I’m getting my voice back and getting back who I am. My greatest hope for the future is to continue to find out who I am on my own. I’ve been in a couple for so long that finding out who I am outside of a couple is really difficult and really traumatic. I don’t like it, but it’s like taking cod liver oil – it’s good for me.
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